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Sad times in DMODland in early 2001.
092: A Town Over (Intro) Author: Anton Frolov Release Date: February 27, 2001
I owe "The Orion" an apology. "Goblin Trouble 2" as well. Every mod I criticized for being released in such an unfinished state that it didn't even amount to a credible teaser or demo did not prepare me for "A Town Over."
There are two screens. One of them has essentially nothing on it, but is blocked off on every side but one - Dink wonders how trying to wander to the next town could have teleported him here. On the next screen, a knight makes a fairy explode with his mind (no sound effect, though). Dink objects, and for this he is cursed with weakness and 'poordom'. He disappears, and then there's nothing. Nothing at all but these two empty screens and your gold taking an awful long time to go down to 5 for some reason.
I think it's the DMOD that really got cursed with weakness and poordom, because it was definitely weak and poor. Hey-oooo! Next!
093: The Moneyspell (Demo) Author: Nick Vervaeke Release Date: March 8, 2001
REPUTATION NOTE: This DMOD is one of the incredibly select group to have a score lower than 1.0 (0.9) on the Dink Network!
Oh no, it's the "Dink 007" guy again. Like me, he didn't learn the lesson to quit after one abysmal DMOD. How'd he do this time? C'mon, you already know the answer to that.
This is at least better than "Dink 007." I mean, it contains some things that actually work, including a plot concept that is at least kind of original. Dink must retrieve a spell for a wizard - a spell that makes money. The moneyspell. The wizard promises Dink that when he brings back the spell, the wizard will give him "half off" the money, which is a funny typo and a funny promise. Does the spell produce a specific amount of money, then? Half of what, exactly?
You're warped to a huge, empty, square map. There are four houses, each containing one person, but only one of them is at all relevant - it contains another wizard (he looks the same as the one at the start, which really makes you think he's the same one at first). He'll warp you to another screen where Dink faces a tedious fight against a giant bonca. Winning warps you back, and talking to the wizard again produces the same response as before. When you teleport to the bonca area this time (because you'll get sent there regardless of whether you agree to go or refuse), you're stuck, as there's no longer a bonca to fight. If the wizard script worked correctly, when you got back he'd tell you that the demo was over and the game would end.
Some of the terrible screens here look kind of interesting, in a way. There's a variety of bad tile placement that I haven't seen before - and look at those boncas, stamped all over without a single thought.
I get a weird feeling when I'm wandering through one of these really bad DMODs. It's not exactly the feeling I get when playing a really bad original game. I mean, the basic trappings of Dink Smallwood are here - the engine and the graphics that the original team worked hard on. More than that, as a player of Dink I have a certain emotional attachment to these things. I have a character and a vague outline of a world in my head. When I jump in, I'm ready to fill in certain details that may not exist. But there's a certain moment where it all falls away. I realize that I'm all alone in here, in this desolate thing without a purpose. It's like the bones and some of the skin of a familiar thing have been stood up. From far away, I might think that I recognize it, but as I get closer, the unease becomes deeper. Without that spark of wit or creativity that makes me feel a human connection, it is like a dead thing masquerading as alive.
"Moneyspell" is bad. Don't play it.
092: A Town Over (Intro) Author: Anton Frolov Release Date: February 27, 2001
************This DMOD, "A Town Over,"************** ********Has been awarded the prestigious********* ****DINK FOREVER MEMORIAL AWARD OF BADNESS***** ********On this day February 8, 2014********
I owe "The Orion" an apology. "Goblin Trouble 2" as well. Every mod I criticized for being released in such an unfinished state that it didn't even amount to a credible teaser or demo did not prepare me for "A Town Over."
There are two screens. One of them has essentially nothing on it, but is blocked off on every side but one - Dink wonders how trying to wander to the next town could have teleported him here. On the next screen, a knight makes a fairy explode with his mind (no sound effect, though). Dink objects, and for this he is cursed with weakness and 'poordom'. He disappears, and then there's nothing. Nothing at all but these two empty screens and your gold taking an awful long time to go down to 5 for some reason.
I think it's the DMOD that really got cursed with weakness and poordom, because it was definitely weak and poor. Hey-oooo! Next!
093: The Moneyspell (Demo) Author: Nick Vervaeke Release Date: March 8, 2001
REPUTATION NOTE: This DMOD is one of the incredibly select group to have a score lower than 1.0 (0.9) on the Dink Network!
Oh no, it's the "Dink 007" guy again. Like me, he didn't learn the lesson to quit after one abysmal DMOD. How'd he do this time? C'mon, you already know the answer to that.
***********This DMOD, "The Moneyspell,"************ ********Has been awarded the prestigious********* ****DINK FOREVER MEMORIAL AWARD OF BADNESS***** ********On this day February 8, 2014********
This is at least better than "Dink 007." I mean, it contains some things that actually work, including a plot concept that is at least kind of original. Dink must retrieve a spell for a wizard - a spell that makes money. The moneyspell. The wizard promises Dink that when he brings back the spell, the wizard will give him "half off" the money, which is a funny typo and a funny promise. Does the spell produce a specific amount of money, then? Half of what, exactly?
You're warped to a huge, empty, square map. There are four houses, each containing one person, but only one of them is at all relevant - it contains another wizard (he looks the same as the one at the start, which really makes you think he's the same one at first). He'll warp you to another screen where Dink faces a tedious fight against a giant bonca. Winning warps you back, and talking to the wizard again produces the same response as before. When you teleport to the bonca area this time (because you'll get sent there regardless of whether you agree to go or refuse), you're stuck, as there's no longer a bonca to fight. If the wizard script worked correctly, when you got back he'd tell you that the demo was over and the game would end.
Some of the terrible screens here look kind of interesting, in a way. There's a variety of bad tile placement that I haven't seen before - and look at those boncas, stamped all over without a single thought.
I get a weird feeling when I'm wandering through one of these really bad DMODs. It's not exactly the feeling I get when playing a really bad original game. I mean, the basic trappings of Dink Smallwood are here - the engine and the graphics that the original team worked hard on. More than that, as a player of Dink I have a certain emotional attachment to these things. I have a character and a vague outline of a world in my head. When I jump in, I'm ready to fill in certain details that may not exist. But there's a certain moment where it all falls away. I realize that I'm all alone in here, in this desolate thing without a purpose. It's like the bones and some of the skin of a familiar thing have been stood up. From far away, I might think that I recognize it, but as I get closer, the unease becomes deeper. Without that spark of wit or creativity that makes me feel a human connection, it is like a dead thing masquerading as alive.
"Moneyspell" is bad. Don't play it.
