The Dink Network

Phishing is such a terrible email scam. Personally, I am a Nigerian Prince, and I lost a great deal of money to one of these phishing scams, and the money was placed in a bank account I did not have access to. So I sent out a great deal of emails to people in other countries, asking for their help in recovering the money these phishing scammers had stolen from me, telling them the whole story about how I was a Nigerian Prince, and nobody believed me! Instead, a bunch of scammers started copying me and falsely claiming to be Nigerian Princes trying to reclaim stolen money themselves... and they were the same scammers who had ripped me off! I have been trying to track them down, and emailing anyone who may have been contacted by them, asking for help and explaining my plight as a Nigerian Prince.

Hardly anyone ever emails me back, but most of them send back sarcastic emails explaining to me that Nigeria is a democracy and not a kingdom and mocking me for being a Prince. Duh, I know that, but what these people don't know is that Nigeria is the most populous and diverse nation in Africa, the central government of Nigeria is weak, and there are a large number of autonomous local, regional, and tribal governments in Nigeria, from villages with village elders all the way up to full-fledged kingdoms with Kings, such as the Kingdom of Nri in which I am a Prince.

Anyway, I am still trying to get the money back that those phishing scammers took from me. I can't believe I fell for their scam thinking I could get free Microsoft Points for Xbox Live! I am a gamer! Our kingdom is dirt poor! I'm serious! We're so poor we literally use dirt as our currency! And now that my bank account full of dirt has been emptied, I have no dirt to plant my crops in! Not real crops! I play FarmVille on Facebook!