The Dink Network

: May I have your attention please?

: May I have your attention please?

: Will the real Redink please stand up?

: I repeat, will the real Redink please stand up?

: We're gonna have a problem here..

: Y'all act like you never seen a white person before

: Jaws all on the floor like Tyrisis, like WC just burst in the door

: and started whoopin her ass worse than before

: they first were divorce, throwin her over furniture (Ahh!)

: It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,

: he didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"

: And Dan Walma said... nothing you idiots!

: Dan Walma's dead, he's locked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)

: Feminist women love Redink{*vocal turntable:

: chigga chigga chigga*} "Redink, I'm sick of him

: Look at him, walkin around grabbin his you-know-what

: Flippin the you-know-who," "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"

: Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose

: But no worse, than what's goin on in your parents' bedrooms

: Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't

: but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose

: "My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"

: And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss

: And that's the message that we deliver to little kids

: And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is

: Of course they gonna know what intercourse is

: By the time they hit fourth grade

: They got the Discovery Channel don't they?

: "We ain't nothing but mammals.." Well, some of us cannibals

: who cut other people open like cantaloupes {*SLURP*}

: But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes

: then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope

: {*EWWW!*} But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote

: Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes

: Chorus: Redink (repeat 2X)

: I'm Redink, yes I'm the real Redink

: All you other Redinks are just imitating

: So won't the real Redink please stand up,

: please stand up, please stand up?

: Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell his records;

: well I do, so f**k him and f**k you too!

: You think I give a dang about a DOTM?

: Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me

: "But Redink, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"

: Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?

: So you can, sit me here next to WC?

: s**t, SimonK better switch me chairs

: so I can sit next to Tal and Dukie

: and hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first

: You little b***h, put me on blast on MTV

: "Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kyle, hee-hee!"

: I should download her audio on MP3

: and show the whole world how you gave Redink VD {*AHHH!*}

: I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me

: so I have been sent here to destroy you {*bzzzt*}

: And there's a million of us just like me

: who cuss like me; who just don't give a f**k like me

: who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me

: and just might be the next best thing but not quite me!

: I'm like a head trip to listen to, cause I'm only givin you

: things you joke about with your friends inside your living room

: The only difference is I got the balls to say it

: in front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or sugarcoated at all

: I just get on the mic and spit it

: and whether you like to admit it {*ERR*} I just s**t it

: better than ninety percent of you rappers out can

: Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like valiums

: It's funny; cause at the rate I'm goin when I'm thirty

: I'll be the only person in the nursin home flirting

: Pinchin nurses asses when I'm jackin off with Jergens

: And I'm jerkin but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working

: And every single person is a Redink lurkin

: He could be workin at Burger King, spittin on your onion rings

: {*HACH*} Or in the parkin lot, circling

: Screaming "I don't give a f**k!"

: with his windows down and his system up

: So, will the real Redink please stand up?

: And put one of those fingers on each hand up?

: And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control

: and one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?

: Ha ha

: Guess there's a Redink in all of us

: f**k it, let's all stand up

Very nice... I'm... impressed.