Discussion
I really feel like a discussion about how excess booze abuse can affect future child benefit spending.
For example. quote from Metatarasal in another thread!
And so you shall have it meta. You can take this there if you so desire. But for now...
I am learning about how family violence (and stress) effects the development of the brain of a child who witnesses or is a victim of it. Very interesting stuff, parents think their kids will not remember it if they are young - but - its hotwired in there as part of their development because these kids brains actually develop differently to a child that does not witness abuse and violence and it effects the way they react to the world in general for life because of the "pathways" forged when their brains were developing and experiencing this. Scary stuff!
Why is domestic violence getting so out of hand? It is apparently a huge problem in our society in NZ, how do other countries fare?
Exerpt from: Stress-Violence and brain development
Children who experience chronic stress in infancy use their brains differently later in life. They may later lack the neuronal pathways that would present adult assistance as a possible solution to problems
According to Perry’s research (1996), chronic stress in the first years can cause changes in attention abilities, impulse control, sleep, and fine motor control. Chronic activation of the parts of the brain involved in responding to fear can “wear out” other parts of the brain involved in higher level thinking. As an evolutionary function of the brain, when survival is at stake people do not use their more thoughtful, reflective parts of the brain. Instead, cortisol, adrenalin, and other hormones activate the part of the brain that focuses on choosing a survival strategy: fight or flight, or in very young infants, freeze. As these neural connections are reinforced through usage, they become the predominate pathways the brain uses to assess situations. Every event is perceived as a life-or-death situation. The brain that results from these early experiences may be highly adaptive in abusive or neglectful situations, but it is inadequate for the work of healthy relationships.
Domestic violence more reading
And no I dont have a specific interest in this subject, just find it intriguing how it can apparently effect development of the brain. I also wonder - how do they measure this stuff. Like how do they decide this adult would have been another way with different coping mechanisms without witnessing or being part of violence in their formative years...
For example. quote from Metatarasal in another thread!
And so you shall have it meta. You can take this there if you so desire. But for now...
I am learning about how family violence (and stress) effects the development of the brain of a child who witnesses or is a victim of it. Very interesting stuff, parents think their kids will not remember it if they are young - but - its hotwired in there as part of their development because these kids brains actually develop differently to a child that does not witness abuse and violence and it effects the way they react to the world in general for life because of the "pathways" forged when their brains were developing and experiencing this. Scary stuff!
Why is domestic violence getting so out of hand? It is apparently a huge problem in our society in NZ, how do other countries fare?
Exerpt from: Stress-Violence and brain development
Children who experience chronic stress in infancy use their brains differently later in life. They may later lack the neuronal pathways that would present adult assistance as a possible solution to problems
According to Perry’s research (1996), chronic stress in the first years can cause changes in attention abilities, impulse control, sleep, and fine motor control. Chronic activation of the parts of the brain involved in responding to fear can “wear out” other parts of the brain involved in higher level thinking. As an evolutionary function of the brain, when survival is at stake people do not use their more thoughtful, reflective parts of the brain. Instead, cortisol, adrenalin, and other hormones activate the part of the brain that focuses on choosing a survival strategy: fight or flight, or in very young infants, freeze. As these neural connections are reinforced through usage, they become the predominate pathways the brain uses to assess situations. Every event is perceived as a life-or-death situation. The brain that results from these early experiences may be highly adaptive in abusive or neglectful situations, but it is inadequate for the work of healthy relationships.
Domestic violence more reading
And no I dont have a specific interest in this subject, just find it intriguing how it can apparently effect development of the brain. I also wonder - how do they measure this stuff. Like how do they decide this adult would have been another way with different coping mechanisms without witnessing or being part of violence in their formative years...
From a logical point of view: Young children and babies experience the fastest growth that a human will experience in his/her life, mentally and physically. They learn tremendous quantities of information and pick up a massive inventory of diverse skills at this time. By the time they are 5 years old, your average child is emulating those around them. Furthermore, we know that babies are extremely sensitive to most stimuli - whilst they may not understand the meaning of the words, they certainly understand the tones and inflections etc in similar way to horses, I imagine. Sadly, this hypersensitivity is lost on most people as they become older, but some retain it more then others: artists, melancholies etc.
So why is domestic violence getting so out of hand? This is a problem right across the world - third world and developing countries included.
I believe - this on a more philosophical note - that "the love of many waxes cold" because, although society is becoming more legalistic, it is also becoming more hedonistic and selfish. In fact, they dramatic rise in societal legalism and policing is due to the fact that hedonism and selfishness are ripping our societies apart.
So why is domestic violence getting so out of hand? This is a problem right across the world - third world and developing countries included.
I believe - this on a more philosophical note - that "the love of many waxes cold" because, although society is becoming more legalistic, it is also becoming more hedonistic and selfish. In fact, they dramatic rise in societal legalism and policing is due to the fact that hedonism and selfishness are ripping our societies apart.
I always thought the main perpetrators in NZ were some Maori families who had it in them as part of their traditions. I remember years ago one of them got jailed for beating their son to death.
Is domestic violence getting out of hand? I would think there must be a lot less of it in the world today, than there was 30 years ago, and less then than a 100 years ago.
I don't understand what were discussing. The effects domestic violence has on the development of a young child, or demestic violence in itself?
Hmm schnapps, thats a thought - maybe the self centered attitudes of todays society isnt helping
I think it was prevalant in those days scratcher - I just think it was kept so quiet like the families shame, shh dont tell blah blah - and of you are taught that is how it is as u are growing up you become accepting it is the done thing - you dont know any different so it continues along the generations - just now - some have finally realised that they dont have to take it any more so more people say stop than ever in our past.
Yeold - yes Maori families are traditionally bad for it but it isnt all maori - oh and he got out of jail... go figure...
Mrgantoe
Whatever you wanna say is fine
I think it was prevalant in those days scratcher - I just think it was kept so quiet like the families shame, shh dont tell blah blah - and of you are taught that is how it is as u are growing up you become accepting it is the done thing - you dont know any different so it continues along the generations - just now - some have finally realised that they dont have to take it any more so more people say stop than ever in our past.
Yeold - yes Maori families are traditionally bad for it but it isnt all maori - oh and he got out of jail... go figure...
Mrgantoe
Whatever you wanna say is fine
I blame capitalism.
Capitalism can be blamed for many things. The 'struggle for money' that the capitalist system causes is definitely stimulating people to forget the truly important things in life. But on the end of the day I believe that most people actually have a choice. The capitalist system does (in many cases) not force you to behave selfish. Of course being not selfish will often cost you money, but you really get something back in return.
I think that (in western countries) we can really blame another thing as well: The decline of religious activity. In the old days many people attended church regularly which gave them not only personal relationships but also some form of outside scrutiny in their relationship. This decline causes many more people's problems to remain isolated I think...
I think that (in western countries) we can really blame another thing as well: The decline of religious activity. In the old days many people attended church regularly which gave them not only personal relationships but also some form of outside scrutiny in their relationship. This decline causes many more people's problems to remain isolated I think...
It does affect the mind. And if a child is subjected to verbal and/or physical abuse (especially by their parents) they get depressed to the point of self-cutting and suicide.
It also makes them violent themselves, as does not being given attention by their parents. I read a whole story of a woman who was depressed from 11 to 26.
But I'm surprised to learn that it's still in NZ, which is a developed nation.
It also makes them violent themselves, as does not being given attention by their parents. I read a whole story of a woman who was depressed from 11 to 26.
But I'm surprised to learn that it's still in NZ, which is a developed nation.
It's because we view it as a problem now. In decades past if you belted your child it was to teach him a lesson, and if you beat your wife because she overcooked your food well then that's all part of marriage and she would understand that.
The reason it's on the rise is because it is taken seriously when reported. The overall activity level has most likely declined.
The reason it's on the rise is because it is taken seriously when reported. The overall activity level has most likely declined.
I tend to agree with Scratcher. I must have been worse before, when it was not even considered a crime. But on the other hand, it seems very strange that people need laws to forbid such behavior, when it really is obvious that it is destructive.
You should be the last person accusing anyone of making useless threads. 
I just realized something,our ''discussion'' wouldn't help the children or make it worse for them
Maybe not duckhater - but maybe in the future when we all have kids we will remember something we read here, or we see someone who is being abused and say something to prevent it and THATS how we make a difference. Maybe we simply end up friends with someone that has been abused this way and continue to be friends with more understanding of why they react differently to what we expect them to. That stuff helps someone surely?
Edit: danged banana editing LOL
Maybe not duckhater - but maybe in the future when we all have kids we will remember something we read here, or we see someone who is being abused and say something to prevent it and THATS how we make a difference. Maybe we simply end up friends with someone that has been abused this way and continue to be friends with more understanding of why they react differently to what we expect them to. That stuff helps someone surely?
Edit: danged banana editing LOL
Heh heh, you have learned well my young apprentice... Soon our domination of the galaxy will be complete... With the power of the dark side of the Banana nothing can stop us!
He'll not be your apprentice for long. I shall have him as my apprentice soon, and I shall manage that by giving him a free pizza.
NO!! I will not let him join the light! He will forever belong to the dark side... Or he... shall.... DIE! 
*grabs his glowing red light-banana and charges at you screaming*
*grabs his glowing red light-banana and charges at you screaming*
I have a friend travelling through NZ at the moment and has already spent 11 months there. He's backpacking and hitchhiking through the country and he's met many Maori families on his travels. He's told me that some of them have a wild lifestyle, open drug abuse, domestic violence (which he cleverly ran from once), but others are just really really friendly and normal, much friendlier than people in Belgium.
So there you have it, anecdotal material that concludes: Not everyone is the same. Who would have thought
So there you have it, anecdotal material that concludes: Not everyone is the same. Who would have thought
Cant just blame the maoris tho - it is kinda traditional with them because its so generational and accepted - like 'Love each other with your fists' hehe(tho thats changing) but we do it as well. I used to ride with the police on a weekend and the number of domestics was scary and it wasnt the maori families we had callouts to - because they just took it and never phoned the cops lol, it was part of their lifestyles.
Hope your friend gets down to the lower South Kyle, its nicer here than in all of NZ Less frenetic and the scenery is awesome. There is way less maori people down here too, the larger population of them seem to be in the north island.
I have been through Belgium and theyre pretty nice there too, way more friendly than lower Europe and wow is it pretty there )
Hope your friend gets down to the lower South Kyle, its nicer here than in all of NZ
Less frenetic and the scenery is awesome. There is way less maori people down here too, the larger population of them seem to be in the north island.I have been through Belgium and theyre pretty nice there too, way more friendly than lower Europe and wow is it pretty there
) Actually he's travelled throughout the entire country, seen just about everything during his year there. He's hiked through 11 (?) of the national parks and he keeps bragging about how beautiful and overwhelming it all is
Yeah I think its pretty special here too Wow a whole year, how long is he planning to stay?
Wow a whole year, how long is he planning to stay?Kyle, how much money to buy your friend's awesome life?!
You should try coming to kerala.
He's coming home next month. He pretty much just worked like normal for half a year, saved everything up and left on the trip. He still has some left over budget even. But this is also because the people in NZ take him in for dinner and a night's rest all the time xD I think his hiking material and clothing cost a lot of money though, and he had that already before he started saving up.
