The Dink Network

It may not sound like much, but I was looking on 9gag, and noticed my phone's screen closes after a certain gif ends. WHY?!

That's all?

My phone seems to determine for itself when it wants to turn off.
The battery will often go from four bars to two bars to one bar the three bars to on bar to four bars to dead.
If I turn it off it will assume I've set it to text and call random people mode. This mode has two parts. The first is to start texting gibberish to people or calling the same number over and over. The second part turns to volume up all the way. This way I know when someone replies to my ghost phone.

I may need a new phone.

They're schizophrenic, not possessed. If they were possessed, they would bleed and scream curses at you.

Even your phone knows 9gag is shit.

That's not possession. Possession is when the phone rises up, turns on, and opens some non-existent app by itself that gives it a face like the one in Ripper from 1996. Then it begins speaking about hell and the end times.

I've gotten used to it.

I solved it. It was the fact that the gif was 1 min. long, and my phone was set to close after 1 min....So....yeah.... )

But there is something weird around my house!I was sleeping on my pillow and then I went to the bathroom , and when I came back I had 2 pillows. I asked my parents, they know nothing of it, and my only brother is in college. SPOOOKY

A ghost clearly wanted you to be more comfortable. You should tell it that it shouldn't afraid. Then, befriend it and tell ghost stories.

I knew you'd say that : )). Me and him/her would be best friends!

You must mate with the ghost, they is the reason it added another pillow. Do it, FOR SCIENCE, & porn money.

Yes, there is technology to determine if footage has been edited in any way. Duck that ghost and convince some scientists to look over and check to make sure it's 100% real. It's about time those guys got away from their Large Money Collider and did something that might actually be useful.

I solved it. It was the fact that the gif was 1 min. long, and my phone was set to close after 1 min....So....yeah.... )

But there is something weird around my house!I was sleeping on my pillow and then I went to the bathroom , and when I came back I had 2 pillows. I asked my parents, they know nothing of it, and my only brother is in college. SPOOOKY

2spoopy4me.

You must mate with the ghost, they is the reason it added another pillow.Do it, FOR SCIENCE, & porn money.

But I'm 14 ;_;

The law hasn't included ghosts yet. This is your chance.

The law hasn't included ghosts yet. This is your chance.
Why would I want to have sex with a ghost? Actually why would I want to have sex?! I'm freakin' 14!!

I'm freakin' 14!!

Hey, that's when I found this particular ghost hot. I'm 40, and that's still super hot.

1.I don't mate with ghosts
2.I don't mate at my age

The joke is getting less and less funnier

What joke? You could make a great discovery.

What joke? You could make a great discovery.

You know something? Why don't you go to a graveyard give me the sex tape with a ghost! I'll let you make the discovery!

I'm not welcome in graveyards.

I'm sure you got some ghost in your house just waiting!

I'm not welcome in graveyards.

Given your earlier statements, there's no wonder about that.

No, you don't get it. It's not the ghosts, it's the churches.

Right. Those things.

@Skurn, what was the thing you did to be banned from graveyards? Also be very detailed about it, but keep it pg14 for Blue. Also are you still allowed in pet cemetaries & just cemetaries?

@Blue, You never know the ghost may be 14, you could invite Skurn over to make science in your bed instead if you don't want to, he probably already has.;(

@Skurn, what was the thing you did to be banned from graveyards? Also be very detailed about it, but keep it pg14 for Blue. Also are you still allowed in pet cemetaries & just cemetaries?

I'm a necromancer, Dack. Churches are super not ok with necromancers. The gravekeepers couldn't care less though. They're probably necromancers themselves, anyways.

@Blue, You never know the ghost may be 14, you could invite Skurn over to make science in your bed instead if you don't want to, he probably already has.;(

That would make me an under-age sexer, Dack. Churches are super not ok with that. The Catholics couldn't care less though. They're probably under-age sexers themselves, anyways.

Well the ghost could be 14 or it could be 10000, but we never know. Also would it count as necrophila if it's a ghost, I'm sure you know the charges you've received. Also what do you do with the raised undead, make an army to take the world, have a party with them, practice socializing with actual humans?

I create beautiful things.

I'm starting to feel like I'm on a pedophile forum :/

That's a brain golem.

No, that's Becky, who died from brain cancer. You monster.

Is it? I don't keep track of what parts I'm using. Can't really blame me, can you? I harvest when it's really dark and I don't carry around any light source because I don't want to be seen.

A question many people ask: What if you are being humped by a ghost right now and you don't know it?!

It's always a possibility. Just think of all the times you bend over and how many people would take advantage of being invisible.

@Blue, this is not a pedophile forum, we just don't get to talk with 'People' enough to know what is the norm or wif something can offend someone, & talking with the same types of people only makes it worse. Also if you were being raped by a ghost at least make sure there's protection, you don't want an STD, especially a ghost STD. You also really don't want a Tal or Skurn STD, they mess with the brain like they have managed to show before.

Yeah, that's the last time I have sex, for sure. The STD was horrifying. Try to imagine that video of that guy melting in that water, but starting from the genitals.

And more screaming.

You are surrounded by at least three ghost butts at all times. And there's at least one break dancing aggressively somewhere behind you.

Could the Ghost Busters, Luigi, a vacuum, or some other thing manage to get rid of the ghosts? Also did Blue make sure that he didn't set the pillow down and forget about doing it when he did something else like get a non-exsistent cookie from the fridge?