The Dink Network

Progeny

Uhm... Well thats......um... nice
July 20th, 2005
v1.00
Score : 8.3 good
duck.gif
Tal
Noble He/Him United States
Super Sexy Tal Pal 
Progeny, one of three entries into the Weird D-Mod Contest, is certainly a departure from the norm. The game could be considered a version of Space Invaders developed to fulfill a fetishist's (or, SimonK's) strangest sexual fantasies, thus eliminating it from the to-download list of the easily offended. For those of us with an odd sense of humor and broad taste (sexual or otherwise), though, the title certainly fills a niche.

The gameplay involves shooting Dink's sperm into various orifices resembling private female areas. Based on your timing, your sperm will either bounce off or fill the pseudo-genitalia, the latter causing them to disappear from the game screen. Collecting stamina potions allow you to generate and shoot sperm even more quickly, translating to an increasingly easier time ridding the game of the reproductive organs. Similar to a typical Dink adventure, eliminating enough opposition will reward you with experience, which you gain character levels from. A level in this game translates to another inch of Dink's, uh, "dink" length, and while I don't recall this having any actual benefit for the player, the wit that accompanies each level gain is laugh-out-loud funny. (I managed to reach 10 inches... now, if only I could achieve that in real life.) The game introduces new obstacles with each new level, including harmful cells which bounce diagonally (STDs?) and chastity belts which must be unlocked with keys. Much like the arcade games of yesteryear, the simplicity of the gameplay still translates to plenty of fun.

The audio and visuals are executed well, with sexual content that is certainly adequate for the game. As with most of SimonK's work, the new graphics are absolutely excellent, depicting objects of the sexual process in an amusing manner. The music and sound are also mostly good, with an amusing selection of mainstream tunes and orgasmic moans. My only tiff with the audio was the sound of sperm bouncing off of an object, particularly with my speakers cranked; it was somewhat irritating.

Though the game is solid overall, there were moments where it bothered me. Random sprites will occasionally go much faster than they should, which was especially annoying when I was trying to shoot sperm and it would zoom across the screen (though the original Dink has the same problem with fireballs, so I will assume that it's the engine). Firing sperm/keys at anything on the edges of the screen proved to be aggravating, as well. Also, unlocking the chastity belts seemed unusually difficult to me, as if the timing was incorrectly configured or some such thing. Or maybe I just suck at this game. The game is also quite short for my liking; I enjoy this well enough to play it for more than 15-20 minutes, but it only lasts for that long.

Those minor issues don't detract very much from the experience, however. Overall, Progeny is an.. intimately satisfying D-Mod, with an interesting concept and great graphics to boot. If you don't object to loads of sexual content, then Progeny may cause your pants to be moist. Praise SimonK for another strangely amusing, if short and slightly problematic, project.