The Dink Network

Very Dink Christmas (A)

From the COTPATD project.
October 13th, 2006
Score : 0.0 horrible
Every once in a while, you see an artistic project which obviously took a lot of time and effort but still sucks. Really, really sucks. Just absolutely dire.

And then sometimes you look at the author's name and you realize... YOU are the person who unleashed this abomination on the world.

This dmod was originally supposed to be a quick romp, to be released on christmas, (indeed, the beginning of the game has a christmas theme to it which gradually gets forgotten.) I just kept adding more and more stuff, because I could never see a way to an immediate conclusion. Eventually, I developed a four-part story, based on the elements (laaaaame), of which this dmod is the first 1.5 parts, but even this story kept expanding, as I continued to add stuff to the game. The end result is that everything is shoddy and nothing makes sense.

Style: 0
Some areas are decorated reasonably well, but most are not. The dialogue is either unhelpful, verbose, annoying or all three. There are a number of scripted objects which say lame things when you hit them, but this isn't really a good thing. I like the no-wall style used for the interiors, but that's because, you know, I'm responsible for it.

Something also needs to be said about the frequent and very forced attempts at humor. I am not funny. That is all.

Gameplay: 0
Yeah, the game just kind of sucks. I thought the enemies were pretty cool when I scripted them, but they aren't, unless "cool" means "bugged". The weapons are easy for me to use (duh) but it would be very annoying to figure them out, as the game provides no instructions for the bow or spirit whip.

But the worst part here is the stuff you have to do to progress. There's a lot of meaningless walking back and forth, a lot of random talking to people, some pointless pick-up-object-x-and-bring-it-to-location-y without being told that's what you have to do, etc.

Let me give one example which stands out as particularly bad. There is a boss, early in the game, who can only be beaten by a spell which generally takes over a minute (!!) to charge, and requires no finesse to use. The boss is slow, and has no long range attacks, so the battle comes down to walking in circles for a minute (with no dodging needed) and then casting the spell.

There are also bugs a-plenty which make the game hard to "finish." I tried very hard to fix most of these, but without much success. The game can be beaten, but chances are, you will at some point run into a bug which makes you reload.

Story: 0
Even I can't tell what's going on with the story. All I know is that the names are lame, the characters are lame, and this dmod is lame.

Overall: 0.0
I should really subtract another .1 for bugs.

I'm not going to take it off the DN or anything, but this dmod is an absolute train wreck, whose only real value is as a cautionary tale to aspiring dmod developers (the moral: plan ahead.) Play anything else before you play VDC.