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January 25th 2015, 02:04 AM
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CocoMonkey
Bard He/Him United States
Please Cindy, say the whole name each time. 
344: A Fish Named Bloop Author: Iplaydink Release Date: February 23, 2014
"Fear me, I'm Bloop the Shark Slayer!"

"A Fish Named Bloop" is a remake of "Bloop the Fish," a very bad D-Mod by Instalite in which you play as a fish. When I covered the original "Bloop" way back in September of 2013, I was shocked to see a couple of people defend it in response. I mean, everybody hated it back in 1999, and I don't see how you can blame them - it's a broken D-Mod with very little to do. Still, some people apparently found something to like in it. Iplaydink declared that the MS Paint graphics were "strangely charming." A few posts later, Leprochaun suggested, "Someone should make a bloop the fish 3." The idea for this D-Mod may have been born there.


Oh my goodness graphics!

"A Fish Named Bloop" has an entirely new set of graphics made in an odd, cartoony style with thick line weights that really is quite charming. The sprites have nice shading, too. Some of the animations, though simple, are impressive. I like the blinking octopus. It looks on par with what you'd see from a high-quality Flash cartoon.

This is the first D-Mod that has ever really conveyed the feeling of moving underwater. Using entirely new graphics enables "Bloop" to present a side-view perspective, which makes the game feel different from Dink even though the movement is the same. The rocky undersea world reminds me of underwater games I played as a kid like Ecco the Dolphin or Odell Down Under.

There's no inventory and no escape menu in this simple romp. In a touch that I adore, the usual "talking to nothing" text has been replaced by ridiculous fish and ocean puns. "What-er?" "I don't see anyfish here." "Not much hammerhead shark-ening here." That last one totally doesn't work! It is brilliant.


Uh oh, it's that shark guy! I hate that guy!

What little the original game contained is reproduced here. As before, you have to gather three worms to trade for a bubble weapon, which you need to fight the shark boss. Just as in Instalite's debut, there are spiny urchin enemies floating around. There's also a jellyfish that blocks your path until you can kill it with the bubbles. There were no jellyfish in "Bloop the Fish," but there were in "Bloop the Fish 2," so the jelly might be "A Fish Named Bloop's" nod to SabreTrout's 2003 joke sequel.

This time, "Bloop" has a story. It's a silly story, but there's still more to it than you'd be expecting if you've ever played the original. It seems that Sheldon the Shark, who insists on calling himself "The Amazing Shark Guy," has stolen Uncle Bubbles the Octopus's gold! "Everybody knows you need that money to treat you horrible bubble-illness!" bemoans Bloop's friend Fred. Bloop must get the treasure back... but first, he must collect worms for some reason. Oh, and Bloop apparently used to be friends with Sheldon, making his mission even more personal. Wow! Unfortunately, the cutscene where most of the story is established is full of 3 to 7 second pauses. I have no idea why the author did this, but it's really annoying.


Bloop is on the case!

Though you confront Sheldon and may easily defeat him, the screen never unlocks. This is an intentional reference to the original game. Bloop says, "Yay, I can't wait to give Bubbles back his treasure," but of course you never get the chance. "AFNB" does lose some authenticity points for actually displaying the ending line instead of failing to do so like the original. Kidding, kidding.


Poor, deluded Bloop.

There's a secret to be found. At a certain location, Bloop may take to the sky and encounter more Dink Smallwoods than you or your grandmother can handle.


Uh... Okay.

IplayDink is on a mission to spread the Bloop love. In the readme, he invites anyone so inclined to use these graphics to create more fishy adventures. Long live Bloop, I guess. Seriously though, this is gorgeous, funny in its very existence, and totally unexpected. You really should play it, it doesn't take long at all. I wish Instalite would come back someday; this would blow his mind.

345: Quest for Dorinthia III: Nymera's Quest (Demo) Author: Bill Szczytko Release Date: March 16, 2014
"Nymera has selected you Dink Smallwood to become our newest vampire."

This is the first demo release since "Dink Wars" in early 2011. Over time, the impression that "demo" really means "this will never be finished" has become pretty much absolute, and with good reason. I think that the last full version to replace a demo was "Cloud Castle 2" in 2004.

Bill started work on a third installment of "Quest for Dorinthia" in 2012. In February 2014, he commented on the COTPATD 2000 topic in which I'd talked about the first two D-Mods in the series. It might be that seeing the writeups inspired him to put what he had into a demo, although of course I don't know for sure. He released this on the forum on March 14, but went ahead and made it an official release shortly thereafter. It's a rather short demo - I just got through it and saw everything in 8 minutes - but you do get an idea of what the story would be in the full version.

Nymera is a name I recognize from "Quest for Dorinthia: Special Edition;" she was an awful vampire woman, and she'd suck you dry if you gave her the chance. Here, she's apparently been killing travelers on a road seen in QFDSE. In the intro, we get to see her feed upon a couple of somewhat dumb tourists who I think may have also appeared in the Special Edition. That seems to be the main plot: vampires are after you, and Nymera is their leader.


Tsk, look at all that wasted blood! You're a wasteful vampire, shame on you.

You don't really do any mucking about with vampires in this demo, though. Instead, Dorinthia sends you to the Fisherman's Village to get fish and mushrooms for a soup. You can just buy the fish, but picking the mushrooms requires you to fight some strong pillbugs. You have to be careful, because despite the good stats you start with, the pillbugs are strong enough to take you out in one hit. This village is surprisingly dangerous. You shouldn't bother fighting any unnecessary bugs - Dink's stats plummet to a set level later on in a drinking scene.


That stuff is bad for you.

The people in the village seem to know of Dink. Some of them make lewd and crude comments to Dink about Dorinthia, and he seems taken aback. "Keep filling that hottie up," says one guy. "Wow .. uh.. okay," stammers Dink. What is up with everybody's obsession with this girl and her sexuality? It is downright creepy. Even Dink thinks so!

There's a cameo from Martridge, but he's only here because he's lost and has teleported himself to the wrong place again. Silly Marty!

In addition to the vampires, you learn in this demo about another development that would surely be a major factor in the plot of a full version: rifts are opening in time and space. One of the villagers tells you that some white material with the word "Dell" on it came out of one of them, suggesting that the rift came from the modern world. I'd be interested to see which direction this story might take if this were ever finished.


Dink sure has a way with words.

I'm sure than anybody who enjoyed the previous installments - and I did, especially "Special Edition" - would have a good time with a full QFD3, but there's not a lot to this demo. There are a lot of unused screens mapped out, but the playable portion amounts to picking some mushrooms. Bill has remarked that motivation is a problem, which is understandable. You never know, though - a full version could happen. It's not like anybody would have thought "Special Edition" would happen in the first place.