The Dink Network

Hi all, I am writing a parody (in English)
It is a mix of Harry Potter #5 and The Matrix #1

So if anyone is interested in it when I am done, just write your e-mail adress and i'll send it to you (don't worry, it wont bite )

I have to admit that sounds interesting...I bet you'll have lots of fun with it. I havent read any of the Harry Potter books though.

Sincerely,
The Vault Dweller

I have, and unless this story involves Agent Smith kicking little Harry's head into a wall repeatedly for 12 pages, I don't think it will be a success.

But go for it!

I think Harry would show Neo there really is a spoon.

Thanks SimonK, you reminded me of the spoon, I had forgotten that one

"I have, and unless this story involves Agent Smith kicking little Harry's head into a wall repeatedly for 12 pages, I don't think it will be a success"
Nope, no kicking in this parody, it will perhaps be some cool descriptions of a magic wave in slow motion sent by an agent so Neo Potter must dodge

You can't turn bullet-time into words. It won't work, and it won't be funny.

Sorry to sound harsh, but I really don't think that's the right way to approach it.

What if we say Neo Potter used an timekiller to slow the time down, and he was the only one to move at normal speed?

Neo Potter stood, quietly shatting his pants as Agent Voldidlymort pointed his Magic Wand (and yes, it was WC's kind of magic wand) at him.

Suddenly all manner of colours started to crawl out of the end of this evil "wand", slowly floating through the air towards our hero. Harry found this strange, but not half as strange as when he noticed Hermione (dressed up in sexy, black, skin tight clothing) running towards him veeerrryyy sllloowwwllyy.

Pondering this, Harry sat down for a minute, to have a cigarette and quench his burning need for nicotine. Looking around, he noticed that everything was moving slower than normal, bar himself. In fact, Agent Voldidlymort's wand was still in the process of firing!

I would carry on, but I'm bored now... and after re-reading what I've typed, it's crap. Thats what happens when your not really enjoying something, I guess.

Maybe Jedisecret is a better writer

I sure hope so!

Looks like you've actually come up with some very good ideas...I guess you just need a vivid imagination.

Sincerely,
The Vault Dweller

Try replacing every instance of "wand" in Sabre's post with the word "wang". Eheheh...

That was already implied. Now, replacing one's wang with a wand... Those wooden prostethics sure give you splinters.

I wonder if you can cast vibrate on your wand. I bet Hermione has a strap-on wand.

It may have been implied, but it sounds funnier when it's actually said. Also, try it in the actual book. You'll find some instances...

I now know how some names shall be:

Harry Potter = Neo Potter
Hermoine Granger = Trinity Granger
Ron Weasley = Mouse Weasley
Sirius Black = Morpheus Black

If you have any suggestions to names or whatever, please e-mail me: isdn_suck@hotmail.com

I have it already