The Dink Network


March 13th, 2010
Score : 6.5 fair
Peasant Female Australia steam 
Upon reading my scathing attack in the title, you'd think this to be a game not worthy of any acclaim, but you'd be wrong. At the time of writing, there seems to be a slight trend of making existing games into mods for Dink. Though in retrospect there always has been. I don't quite see the appeal. This is apparently based on an iPhone "app" called Falldown which I have never played because iPhones are terrible.
I have played a game called Bouncedown that is quite similar in nature made by Jagex (you can play it online too). It is easy to say that FallDink pales in comparison.

The graphics are incredibly mediocre. Green slabs for the platforms and borders. This looks pretty poor, considering in Bouncedown, the top contains spikes, and the bottom contains fire, letting you know that you're not supposed to touch it. The graphics for Dink were used in Platform Dink, and have been reused for a similar purpose, as instead of isometric, it's a sidescroller of sorts. Not that this matters, as graphics do nothing for game playing value.

Love Me Do by the Beatles wouldn't be my first choice for music, considering it has nothing to do with anything, and because I loathe The Beatles (though not their individual solo careers).
In Beuc's mine game, he used Close to Me by The Cure, which I always interpreted as being a subtle indicator that mines are close to each other, or that they're locked in a cupboard.
The music sucks basically. Particularly as this is a neverending game of sorts, it's going to run out quite quickly. A long classical piece would have been better, or something that loops.

If you start to play, the first thing you notice is the Dink falls quite abruptly off of platforms, as if he's wearing lead boots. In Bouncedown, you move a lot more horizontally when you get off a platform, and onto another one. I found it incredibly irritating to play because of this movement, and there is no choice in the gravity. Some will of course enjoy the challenge. Though probably not for too long, as after a little while you'll realise that there is no variation in gameplay at all. It's as boring at the start as it is 6 hours later, except the platforms move a bit faster.

In Bouncedown, different platforms will make you bigger/smaller, some are covered in ice or move you around, and others are bouncy which all keep the game interesting enough to play. No such luck here.

A nice touch is that your last score and high scores are saved. It reminds me of the Simpsons episode "Bart the Murderer" where Principal Skinner gets buried under a pile of junk, and passes the time by seeing how many times he can bounce a basketball.

"I made a game of it. Seeing how many times I could bounce the ball in a day, then trying to break that record."

I'd prefer it if people were making original games with good stories, and interesting puzzles instead of trying to rehash arcade games from other platforms (haw haw). I'd simply rather play Bouncedown than this.